It is widely believed that women can be hard to understand. If you’re a man who’s ever been on the perplexed end of this spectrum, you have my sympathy. But men are hardly as simple as ABC either, and clearly because I think women don’t already have enough to say, here are some relationship questions women have been dying to ask men. (I know…So useful right? Only questions, no answers. Okay, since I know you want it, you really, really want it, I will draw on my manly inner self and give you some answers. Just for you only.)
- Why do men think that being in a long-term relationship is the end of fun?
Men: What are you talking about? We love being in long-term relationships. Sleeping with one woman for the rest of our lives, constantly having to fight over the remote, getting to know the intricate details of all our faults on a daily basis without paying for therapy? It’s like a dream come true.
- Is there such a thing as “too slutty”?
Men: No, I mean yes.
- What percentage of your female friends do you want to sleep with?
Men: 100, I mean, zero, absolutely zero percent.
- Have you cheated? How often?
Men: What exactly do you mean by cheating? Is this a trick question?
- How often do you look at porn?
Men: Does looking at it in our heads count?
- What is going through your head when we’re mad at you?
Men: We are thinking contrite thoughts. Devoutly.
- Why do you expect us to watch action movies with you when you do not watch rom-coms with us?
Men: We watch rom-coms with you! Remember that year we were travelling through Europe and got stranded at that B&B which had only that DVD, what was it again? Oh yes, When Harry Met Sally.
- Why won’t you ask for directions?
Men: Sure we do. We always follow directions when we buy IKEA furniture. How do you think we got that cabinet up so fast?
- Why do you enjoy video games so much?
Men: Why do you enjoy buying shoes so much?
10. Why don’t you ever change the toilet paper?
Men: Oh. It’s not automated?
~ Li Ching (Who is the Toilet-Paper-Changing Autobot)